“I hate having my photo taken.”
If I had a rand for every time a couple told me this before their wedding or engagement session, I’d probably be writing this from a yacht.
Usually one person says it first.
Then the other one immediately agrees.
“We’re both terrible in front of the camera.”
“We don’t know how to pose.”
“We always look awkward.”
“My partner hates photos.”
“I don’t like my smile.”
“Please don’t make us do anything cheesy.”
And my personal favorite:
“We’re just not photogenic.”
After more than 20 years as a professional photographer, I can tell you that some of the people you see looking completely relaxed in our portfolio said exactly the same thing before we photographed them.
Being comfortable in front of a camera isn’t your job.
It’s mine.
You Don’t Need to Know How to Pose
This is probably the first thing I want camera-shy couples to understand.
I’m not expecting you to arrive knowing what to do.
You don’t need to know where to put your hands.
You don’t need to practice poses.
You certainly don’t need to spend three weeks watching TikTok videos about how to stand in photographs.
If something needs adjusting, I’ll tell you.
Move your hand slightly.
Turn towards me.
Drop that shoulder.
Walk towards each other.
Look at him, not me.
Come closer.
Slow down.
Stop thinking.
Sometimes the difference between a photograph you hate and one you love is an adjustment so small you wouldn’t even notice me making it.
That’s part of being a professional photographer.
“But We’re Really Awkward”
Good.
You can be awkward.
I’ll work with it.
The problem usually isn’t that couples are genuinely awkward. The problem is that they become hyper-aware of themselves the moment a camera appears.
Suddenly you don’t know how you normally stand.
Your hands have apparently never belonged to you before.
You forget how you usually hug your partner.
Walking becomes a surprisingly complicated activity.
And the more somebody tells you to “act natural,” the less natural you feel.
I understand.
So instead of expecting you to perform for the camera, I would much rather give you something to do.
Walk.
Talk.
Move.
Look at each other.
Fix her hair.
Hold his hand.
Tell her something.
Have a drink.
Laugh at me if you need to.
Movement gives your brain something else to think about.
That’s often when I get the photograph.
Documentary Doesn’t Mean No Direction
This is an important distinction.
Our approach to wedding photography is heavily influenced by documentary storytelling.
I want real reactions.
Real laughter.
Real interactions.
I don’t want to manufacture every second of your wedding day.
But documentary photography does not mean that I abandon you in front of my camera and hope for the best.
There is a time to observe and there is a time to direct.
During your ceremony, speeches, reception and the spontaneous moments happening around you, I am watching.
During your couple portraits, I can give you more direction.
If your posture needs adjusting, I’ll help.
If the light is more flattering two steps to the left, I’ll move you.
If your hand looks uncomfortable, I’ll tell you where to put it.
If the angle isn’t working, I’ll change it.
And if the two of you are completely comfortable and absolutely nailing it without me saying a word?
Then I’ll shut up and photograph it.
Knowing when to direct and when to leave people alone is a large part of the job.
You Don’t Have to Look at the Camera
This one seems to come as an enormous relief to people.
Not every photograph needs to be:
Stand there.
Look here.
Smile.
Click.
Some of my favorite photographs happen when the couple isn’t looking at me at all.
You’re looking at each other.
Walking away from me.
Laughing.
Talking.
Holding hands.
Fixing a dress.
Drinking champagne.
Watching the sunset.
Or simply standing together and having a moment.
If looking directly into a camera makes you freeze, we don’t have to spend your entire session doing it.
I Can Also Give You Space
Sometimes the best way to make someone forget about the photographer is to stop standing right next to them.
I love working with longer lenses when the situation calls for it.
It allows me to step away.
You have breathing room.
You can talk to each other without feeling as though there’s a camera 30 centimeters from your face.
This works beautifully for couples who want a more candid, documentary feeling.
It also lets me capture little interactions between you that often disappear the moment you’re aware I’m watching.
You don’t always need a photographer in your personal space to create intimate photographs.
Sometimes distance is exactly what creates them.
“I Don’t Like How I Look in Photos”
This is a little different from being camera-shy.
And it’s something I take seriously.
Maybe you’ve had photographs taken before that you hated.
Maybe there is something about yourself you’re particularly conscious of.
Maybe you’ve gained weight.
Lost weight.
You don’t like your arms.
Your smile.
Your profile.
Your height difference.
Your teeth.
Your posture.
Or perhaps you can’t even explain it.
You just don’t like photographs of yourself.
Tell me.
You aren’t being difficult or vain.
Knowing what makes you uncomfortable helps me photograph you better.
There are things I can consider through camera position, lens choice, posture, movement, light and angles.
But I also don’t want your entire session to become an exercise in hiding parts of yourself.
My goal is for you to look at the photographs and recognize you — on a really good day.
Please Don’t Spend Your Wedding Day Sucking in Your Stomach
Seriously.
You have enough going on.
Your wedding photographs should not require eight hours of consciously holding your body in a particular position.
Good direction should help you without making you obsess about yourself.
I’ll adjust things when necessary.
Then I want you to forget about me and get back to your wedding.
Because there is a point where worrying constantly about how you look begins stealing the actual experience you’re paying us to photograph.
I would much rather photograph you belly-laughing with your new husband than standing perfectly still because you’re terrified of what your body is doing.
Your Engagement Session Is More Valuable Than You Think
This is one of the reasons we include a pre-wedding or engagement session in most of our wedding packages.
Yes, you get beautiful photographs.
But that’s only part of the value.
It gives us a chance to work together before the wedding.
You discover what it feels like being photographed by us.
We discover how the two of you interact.
I learn whether you need lots of direction or very little.
I see what makes you laugh.
I learn which angles work particularly well for you.
You realize that nobody died.
And by the time your wedding arrives, the camera isn’t quite so unfamiliar anymore.
For camera-shy couples, that can make an enormous difference.
Where Should We Do Our Engagement Photos? A Guide to Choosing the Perfect Location
https://ruthandco.co.za/2026/09/07/engagement-photo-locations-cape-town/
Choose an Engagement Location Where You Can Actually Relax
If you’re already nervous about photographs, I don’t necessarily want to put you somewhere that makes you even more self-conscious.
Your engagement session doesn’t need to happen at the most famous Instagram location in Cape Town.
Choose somewhere that fits you.
Beach people?
Let’s go to the beach.
Love the city?
Let’s walk through Cape Town.
More comfortable having a glass of wine together?
Let’s build the session around that.
Want something quiet and private?
We can find it.
Want to bring the dogs?
Bring the dogs.
Want to stay at home and photograph normal life together?
That’s an option too.
The location should support the way you want the photographs to feel.
David & Peighton’s Kloof Street Couple Session
https://ruthandcophotographyfilm.pic-time.com/client/david-and-peighton
Light Makes a Difference Too
There is another reason professional photography feels different from somebody quickly taking a photograph on a phone.
Light matters.
A lot.
Good light can be incredibly flattering.
That’s why we consider the time of day when planning engagement, couple and vacation sessions.
If you’re nervous about photographs, choosing beautiful soft light gives us another advantage before we’ve even started.
Golden hour can give us warmth and beautiful backlighting.
Blue hour can create something moodier and more cinematic.
Cloudy conditions can give us wonderfully soft light.
And when natural light isn’t enough, we know how to use flash and additional lighting creatively.
You don’t need to understand any of this.
That’s our job.
Golden Hour vs Blue Hour: Why the Right Light Can Completely Change Your Photos
https://ruthandco.co.za/2026/09/28/golden-hour-vs-blue-hour-why-the-right-light-can-completely-change-your-photos/
Your Wedding Day Is Not an Eight-Hour Photoshoot
This is especially important if you’re looking for a Cape Town wedding photographer and already dreading the idea of spending your wedding day posing.
Please don’t.
Your wedding should still feel like a wedding.
Not a commercial production.
Of course we’ll set aside time for your couple photographs.
We’ll do family photographs.
We’ll photograph your bridal party.
We’ll create the beautiful portraits you’ve hired us for.
But between those moments, there is an actual wedding happening.
People you love have travelled to celebrate with you.
Talk to them.
Eat the food.
Dance.
Cry.
Laugh.
Have the champagne.
Enjoy the view.
Forget about us occasionally.
Some of the photographs you’ll love most may happen precisely because you did.
What If My Partner Hates Photos More Than I Do?
This happens all the time.
One person has been saving wedding photographs for two years.
The other would happily have three photographs taken all day and call it done.
Please don’t spend the weeks before your wedding warning your partner:
“You’d better behave for the photographer.”
That immediately turns photography into a chore.
Instead, tell us.
We can keep the couple session moving.
We can give clear direction rather than endlessly repeating poses.
We can build in movement.
We can keep things relaxed.
And once we know we have what we need, we don’t need to keep you there simply because the timeline says “photos.”
Quality over punishment.
What If We’re Coming to Cape Town From Overseas?
Then this advice matters just as much.
We work with international couples travelling to Cape Town and the Western Cape for weddings, honeymoons, engagements, proposals and holidays.
You don’t need to arrive in South Africa already knowing how to pose.
You also don’t need to know which Cape Town location will make you feel comfortable, what time has the best light or how to plan your photography around the weather.
We can help you with that before you arrive.
If you’re particularly nervous about being photographed, tell us during the planning stage.
It helps.
You can even send examples of photographs you love — and photographs you absolutely don’t want.
The more we understand about you, the better we can photograph you.
Cape Town Photographer for International Visitors
https://ruthandco.co.za/2026/09/20/dont-just-visit-cape-town-star-in-your-own-story/
Planning a Surprise Proposal in Cape Town? A Local Photographer’s Guide
https://ruthandco.co.za/2026/09/21/planning-a-surprise-proposal-in-cape-town-a-local-photographers-guide/
A Note About Pinterest
Pinterest is brilliant for inspiration.
Use it.
Send us ideas.
Show us the mood you’re drawn to.
But please don’t arrive believing you have to recreate somebody else’s body, relationship, wedding or photographs.
You are not the couple in the Pinterest photograph.
Your height may be different.
Your clothing is different.
Your location is different.
Your personalities are different.
The light will be different.
And that’s a good thing.
Inspiration helps us understand your taste.
It shouldn’t become a checklist of photographs we have to copy.
I’d rather create something that looks like you.
The Photographs You Love May Not Be the Ones You Expected
Something interesting happens after weddings.
Couples often think their favorite photograph will be the dramatic sunset portrait.
And sometimes it is.
But sometimes it’s Dad looking at you before walking down the aisle.
Your new husband laughing so hard his eyes are closed.
Your grandmother dancing.
The way you looked at each other immediately after the ceremony.
Your best friend fixing your dress.
A photograph you didn’t even know I took.
Those images have almost nothing to do with whether you are “photogenic.”
They have everything to do with being present.
Twenty Years Behind the Camera Changes How You See People
After more than two decades of professional photography, I’ve photographed an enormous variety of people.
Different ages.
Different bodies.
Different personalities.
People who adore cameras.
People who tolerate them.
And people who would probably rather visit the dentist.
There isn’t one pose that works for everybody.
There isn’t one lens for everybody.
There isn’t one formula.
That’s where experience becomes important.
A professional photographer shouldn’t simply know how to operate a camera.
We need to know how to read people.
Sometimes you need confident direction.
Sometimes you need encouragement.
Sometimes you need space.
Sometimes you need me to make you laugh.
And sometimes I need to recognize that the moment happening in front of me is already perfect and not interfere with it.
So, What If You Hate Having Your Photo Taken?
Come anyway.
Come awkward.
Come nervous.
Tell me you hate your photograph being taken.
Tell me you’ve never had a photograph of yourself that you really loved.
Tell me you don’t know what to do with your hands.
That’s fine.
You don’t need to perform for me.
You don’t need modelling experience.
You don’t even need to particularly enjoy having a camera pointed at you.
You just need to show up as yourselves.
We’ll take care of the rest.
Looking for a Cape Town Photographer Who Won’t Make You Feel Awkward?
Ruth & Co Photography & Film photographs weddings, engagements, couples, proposals, families and international visitors throughout Cape Town, the Cape Winelands and the Western Cape.
Our approach combines documentary storytelling with confident direction when you need it.
So if you’re looking for a Cape Town wedding photographer but the thought of spending your wedding day posing makes you want to run in the opposite direction, talk to us.
If you’re travelling to Cape Town from overseas and want beautiful photographs without feeling as though you’re trapped in a photoshoot, talk to us too.
Tell us what makes you nervous.
Tell us what you love.
And then let’s create photographs that feel like you.
VIEW OUR WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHY & FILM
https://ruthandco.co.za/our-services/
ENQUIRE WITH RUTH & CO
https://ruthandco.co.za/contact/
Getting Married in Cape Town – Complete Guide for International Couples
https://ruthandco.co.za/2026/08/21/getting-married-in-cape-town-a-complete-guide-for-international-couples/
Cape Town Wedding Weather by Month
https://ruthandco.co.za/2026/09/29/cape-town-wedding-weather-by-month/
Golden Hour vs Blue Hour
https://ruthandco.co.za/2026/09/28/golden-hour-vs-blue-hour-why-the-right-light-can-completely-change-your-photos/
